Colton left today for a week to go to outdoor school. He was so excited, and in all of the last minute hurrying, I forgot to get a picture of him. He was like a pack mule with all of his stuff! I know he's going to have a blast. I know he'll be safe. But I feel like I packed my heart up, and sent it to camp today.
I was helping out in Kennedy's class this morning, and found myself wanting to run down to his classroom to see if he was still there. I don't want him to forget his lunch. What if he forgets his hat! What if he's cold, or wet? So many worries. Nothing that would be the end of the world. Just little things that as his mother I want him to have. Comfort things. Things he would have is I was there! I know that this is a natural part of life, this whole letting go thing. But I just thought I'd be better at it. As I left the school, I saw that they were gone, and I bawled all the way home. What is wrong with me today? It's so unlike me.
Now really, he's only going to be 5 days. And he's been gone before. Scout overnighters and such. But this is a week, and I just feel so NOT in control. He's in control this week. I just hope he comes home with all of the stuff he took. He certainly had plenty of instructions from Landon and I. Probably too many. But at least he'll be prepared for anything that might happen up there. So here I am. At the beginning of a long, road. One that I'm not prepared for, but am on nonetheless. I just hope I get a little bit better at this whole letting go thing before his mission. However, I really don't think it gets any easier. Maybe I'll just be numb by then!
6 comments:
Oh this makes me sad too and he's not even my kid. I am already dreading such separations. The mere thought of putting one of my kids on a plane for his mission sends me into tears. Good luck! (To you, I'm sure he'll have the time of his life!)
This made me a little teary. I think about that mission thing a lot, but only because I'm not sure that my little Anders will be able to go, and, I'll be counting the days for Liam to go...
He will be just fine! You'll be OK! The week will go so fast.
I can totally relate. He'll be fine but you'll worry the whole time. I can't even talk about the mission thing!
Amy - So sad!!! It only gets worse!!! Kelcey had her last prom, last hs soccer game, almost out of YW! I have been a mess!! Crying when she left for prom, crying in church when she gets up to talk, crying when she plays soccer. I just want to grab her, make her young again & never let her go! You NEVER get used to them leaving! Cannot even stand when Trent goes to overnight camp. Cry & worry & worry some more. It is exhausting!!! Of course he will have a BLAST!! Darn kids!! Had a blast with my sister!! Thanks for being there for me!! Lisa
So sad! I am the worst about my kids growing up. Good Luck this week!!!!
What a sweet post. Hang in there good buddy. Yes, I do not want to be around when he leaves on a mission!
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